Thursday, February 4, 2010


As I've started typing up my old diaries, I've quickly discovered that I'll need to provide context for quite a few of them, at least at the beginning. I was writing them for myself, so I didn't need to explain certain things, like who were the most important people in my life versus those on the periphery. To that end, most (possibly all) high school posts will be preceded by a "Notes from 2010" post, where I'll give that context.

And I will also probably laugh at myself a lot in those notes. Because it's really, really hard not to when I'm talking about old crushes--mostly on people who had no idea I existed--and reading old rants about not getting along with my mother--all that shit teenagers go through, and that I am so, so thankful I'm long past. I'm alternately amused by, exasperated with and genuinely sorry for the girl I used to be, and I can't resist poking fun at my old self places where I'm taking myself waaay more seriously than I deserved to. I mean-who could? When you're talking about a part of your life when you were severely depressed-to the point that I probably should have sought treatment a lot more aggressively than I did-you gotta find the funny. Otherwise-God, I don't think I'd want to read this, much less expect anyone else to.

So feel free to snicker at me (and I do mean both then-me and now-me) whenever I deserve it. It'll make the serious parts a lot more readable, and I'll be able to present a much fuller picture of who I was if I include the bits that makes me want to smack old myself upside the head.

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